For those of you familiar with the film "Groundhog Day", is it me, or has this Ashes series borne an uncanny resemblance to the 1980's film starring Bill Murray? In the film, Murray's character wakes up every morning and lives out exactly the same day as the one before, and frustratingly, like England in this series, there seemed precious little he could do to change the inevitable course of events.
As in the film, this particular series involved a superb supporting cast. England captain Alastair Cook (apart from the last test), woke up on the first morning of each test match and proceeded to lose the toss. At some point, with the bat in hand, either one, or a combination of Chris Rogers, David Warner, Steve Smith, and the irrepressible Brad Haddin, managed to drag Australia out of a deepening hole.
Enter the other members of the cast - Ryan Harris, Peter Siddle, Nathan Lyon, and for me, the star of the show, Mitchell Johnson. This very talented, aggressive and disciplined quartet of bowlers, were probably responsible for each of England's batsmen waking up in their hotel bedrooms each breaking dawn, cursing the fact that once again, and without an apparent antidote, they were going to be put through the ignominious torture of another first innings capitulation.
Battered and with heads bowed, the England team would then take to the field to once again endure the inevitable Australian second innings onslaught; the result of which, would leave England the proverbial mountain to climb in their own second innings; a mountain which, in true "Groundhog" fashion, always left them peering high up to the summit; beaten, embarrassed, and utterly confused.
Australia have been brilliant . They are certainly not the most talented side to ever represent their country, but once they got on a role, late on day one in Brisbane, they have completely steamrollered England to win the series 5 - 0. To put their achievement into context, this is only the third time in Ashes history, that Australia have completed a "whitewash" … albeit, with a generous splash of pink, courtesy of Glen Mcgrath's breast cancer awareness day …
Another amazing statistic is, that for the first time in Ashes history, Australia have taken all one hundred wickets available to them over a five match series. When you look back over recent history and consider the great Australian sides that have gone before Michael Clarke's team, you begin to wonder - without taking anything away from their dominance of the series - how much these amazing feats are attributable to their own individual and collective talents, or whether England have been their own architects, in a sudden and dramatic fall from the top of the world cricket table.
The words "end of an era" have been widely used by a multitude of people from within 'Camp England'. Coaches, players, and administrators alike, have quickly jumped on this particular bandwagon, and whilst it looks very much like that this could well be the case, you would have had to have had a bionic ear or two, to have heard anybody uttering those words before the tour got underway. This is nothing more than a damage limitation exercise that even 'king of spin' Alistair Campbell would have been proud of.
Graham Swann's retirement comments, I think, shed more light on England's demise than a mere collection of poor performances. I find it interesting, that having pulled out of an Ashes series with two matches to go, he found it necessary to make his " heads up backsides " quote.
Although Swann himself went to great lengths after the press conference, to dispel any rumours that the comment was aimed at some of his colleagues.... Kevin Pietersen in particular … did anyone really believe him ? It leaves me thinking, that no matter how good a performer he has been for his country over the years … and he has been phenomenal … that any player with their head up their own backside would have been difficult for Swann himself to spot, looking as he did from the same vantage point as the players he has accused.
Communication to the English public in this instance was poor. Surely his elbow injury, and the realisation that it could no longer stand up to the rigours of the longer formats of the game would have been a much better reason to cite for his retirement. Or maybe saying that he was going to be left out of the last two matches anyway, would have given the selectors a wonderful opportunity to mention, "moving forward" and "the beginning of the search for Swann's replacement".
Of course a player has the individual right to chose the timing and the reasons for their own retirement, but, as I have said in other articles, I think that there is more than meets the eye about the many problems the England camp have encountered on this tour.
No doubt some of those problems (but not all) will eventually get an airing; they have to, because I feel that somewhere, someone involved in the England set up, owes it to the England supporters who have either travelled at great personal expense, or who have suffered sleep deprivation for the cause back at home, deserve to know at least a little of what was behind the timid capitulation of this England team.